what it actually is...

I just realized that my past blogs is all about getting married! haha~

Well, mainly because that what most "normal" people do when the are about my age or younger or older. Well, whatever that suits them.

Some says getting married is just another step after graduating and getting a job. Some does it for the sake of parents. Some says to complete each other. Some says it's easier to be married- I can't seem to control myself any longer! LOL

But there are some who wants to be married to escape from his/her life. To be able to make his/her own decisions. To have his/her opinion at home. To do whatever they wish to do, to go wherever they want. Why? because, believe it or not..  Some Muslim parents can be a bit controlling towards their child doesn't matter what age the child is or the gender. Harsh truth, but that's the reality. Where is the mistake? Well,  here they are: Parents, heads up please-

1) Children needs love, lots and lots and lots of love, and a great amount of attention. Doesn't matter how old or young they are.

2) Communication: Trust me, there's a major problem in here. Most parents feel the only way to convince their child is to "force" them. You can, when they were young. But, in the future, they will start pretending in front of you.In return, they let you hear, things that you want to hear and tell you things that you only want them to do..

3) Trust: Trust is a very difficult thing. But, if you have raised you child with a good foundation of Islam, insyaAllah she/he will be alright. Now, what does it mean by a good foundation of Islam? Always start with yourself. If you are not patient, then you are lack of iman too. Be patient, tackle things gently.

4) Anger: Control your anger. Why do you think your child doesn't want to talk to you? Coz you keep barking at him/ her!

5) Time changes and so should you. Remember what Muhammad told us. Raise your child according to the time. (zaman). Why do you thing it's different now compared to your time? Of course it's different! Because everything changes.

6) Control: Seriously, I have seen a child, who is so scared to even take a gift from her own teacher! Because she thinks her mummy might scold her.Seriously? If your child is scared of you about everything.. You must be a monster! Remember that I am a teacher and I used to teach very young children from the age of 4 and above. And the worst part is, once the child is grown.. She/He prefers to talk to everyone, except you.


7) Being fair: Here is the most difficult part. Be fair to all. They deserve the best from you.

All of these things I've said is based on my readings, and my close attention to some child that I've approached. A lot of them feel that it is nicer to talk to their teacher or friends. So, if you are having a child, already have a child or planning to have one or more, try not to do all these if you want to raise a good person. well,  it's just an opinion!

I wanna marry a millionare.

I met a friend and she was telling me "I'm not ready to get married coz I have not met the one" *YAWN*
Like, seriously, where and when will you ever meet "the one".

Living in Malaysia, is the toughest.

Why? Coz we have A LOT of western influence in us as well as the eastern.

Its harder, if you are a Muslim. why? Here's why, ladies and gentleman...

Because of the western influence, we learn about all these "worldly" things. We want to be rich and powerful. But, at the same time, we are Malaysians too. We are born to be gentle and subtle and soft. At the same time, we are Muslims, so we have our limitations on certain things. The problem with us is we are trying so hard to balance ALL these.

1) For some certain reason, we really really REALLY care about a person's position. It really matters how much money he is making, what position he has, what car he drives, how big the house is and the list goes on and on...

2) Then, we will be looking at the LOOK. How tall he is, how good he looks, nice body,  too fat, too skinny, his hair, his nose, his hand, bla bla bla...

3) Next, we need to look at his family background. Does he come from a good family?  How "well known" is the family?

4) Education background. Does he have a masters? Did he graduate from overseas? How qualified is he? Degree? Phd? SPM?

 5) Life-style/personality check. Is he a party animal? Is he a party-popper? Is he the serious type? Sit-home-all-day-till-my hair-turns-grey type? I-have-no-friends-except-my-fb-friends type? How about the way he leads his life? Is he stylish? Does he have a great personality?

6) Lastly, and finally... is he pious?

*SIGH*

When I close my eyes, and I think deeply. OMG, if these are what expected from me, I will never be able to get married.

If you ask me, what is your definition of the "RIGHT GUY"? Well, for me, it's pretty simple.
A person who makes me happy, who can provide me with guidance to the right path, and who can provide me with my basic needs. Yes, I do not need a person who can buy me a Ferrari or a10 thousand Prada handbag for me to show off proudly.

It makes me sick in the stomach to even think that there are millions of people dying everyday on the street out of hunger and at the other side of the world, we are buying a handbag worth 10 thousand dollars??

Why do we do that? Why do we wear the most expensive clothes? Because we care what people think of us.

Why do we want to be with the most richest-stable-qualified-influenced guy? Because we care what people think of us.

But, do we care what Allah think of us? Why can't we lead a simple life? Do we bother to help our brothers and sisters who are in need?

Look around you, look at the things we do just because we want to be respected. Just because we fear "what people going to say" about us.

What are we scared of? The society? Not again?? What people going to say? Masya-Allah! We are living in a temporary world.We are all going to die. And no one knows when. Only Allah knows when we will die. So, what is your "property" once you'll die? Unfortunately, we can't bring the million bucks, or the big house or the luxurious things.

Stop judging, everyone. Just stop judging. NO ONE is better than nobody. It does not matter if you are a millionaire or a garbage collector. Have you ever thought that the garbage collector might be in Jannah in the after-life. Maybe he has done a lot of good things in life. Maybe we don't.

I am saying all these as a reminder to myself before everyone.

Remember that Islam is a way of life. It should not be a balance between this and that.

Well, this is a reminder, just in case you forgot. Assalamualikum. Have a great day everyone!